Away she flew.

She strode

Past the onlookers

The staring eyes

The pointed fingers.

She strode

On the path less strewn

On the road less traversed

On the course which was harder.

She climbed the ledge

Shushed all the whispers

Spread her arms

And leapt.

Earlier, she strode.

Now, she flew.

DAY 100.

And that my friends is the end of my 100 happy days pledge!

Lots of memories, lots of struggles to find something happy in the day, hurried flashes of camera, getting out of bed half asleep after having forgotten to post the day's happy picture, and penning some beautiful pieces on days like this and this! Oh and this too!

Pursuing this taught me a very important lesson - Even on the worst days, there's a possibility of joy! Earlier, only Kate Beckett spoke it, now experience does too. 

And I have not been alone in this 100 day journey! Without my family and friends to give me the much needed support, I wouldn't have managed even a day!

Their lovely smiles, crazily optimistic spirits, penchant for unconditional love, a "Hi!" here, a "How are you?" there and sometimes just their being around was enough to make my day.

Dance like it is the last dance. Live like it is your last chance. After all, only cats get nine lives! A little craziness wouldn't make you insane. Been there, done that! ;) Unless, you think I am damaged beyond redemption, then you should steer away from the advice (AND THIS BLOG!) right away.

Technically, this may be the end of my 100 happy days, but I will carry forward this experience for the rest of forever. 

Oops! I could continue typing away but this technically marks the end of my one hour break too and now it is time to get back to my live-in partner - my beloved books!

Psst - There have been days when I have skipped posting, but can we keep it to ourselves, please? A day or two can be forgiven and forgotten right? ;)

Psst again *very discreetly* - My other blog completed a year today! Yay!

Celebrating Womanhood? You decide.

"... Her heels clicking on the tarmac, the street lights lighting her path ahead, talking over the phone while walking down the deserted by-lane to reach the safe havens of her home, she wished her friend a "Happy Women's Day" and kept the line. Another 5 minutes and she would be home, she thought. She heard an oncoming bike and looked sideways to see if there was space to weave through the footpath occupiers. Finding none, she continued walking ahead, expecting the biker to be careful enough not to hurt her. But the bike came and stopped just near her, surprising her and causing her foot to twist while she fell on the footpath. She looked up angrily to see two pairs of eyes leering at her. The anger gave way to fear. The screeching bike had woken some of the beggars and within seconds, which felt like hours, one of those young lads came to help her get back on her feet. Several of them came and stood beside her. Her phone vibrated. An incoming message, announcing  'A 3-day special discount in celebration of Women's Day.' ..."

Yes, there's inequality. Yes, there's commercialization. Yes, there's tyranny. Yes, there's irony.

But, above all, there's hope.

Happy Women's Day.

#100happydays. (Day 45)

#RahmanIshq! - The Rahman concert in Calcutta!

Yesterday evening, the God himself descended in Calcutta, armed with his instruments, the rains signaling his arrival and ceasing at his descent, darkness enveloping a crowd of thousands waiting for a mere glimpse, uproar at his first syllable, adrenalin rushing through the throbbing veins at the first hint of music. That was A.R. Rahman at Calcutta!

What happened on the stage in the next few hours was magic. Maybe see through at times, mesmerizing mostly. But what happened in the crowd around us was a different matter altogether. That too was just so out of the world!

Bang ahead of us was a couple who just couldn't get enough of each other. She seemed to be eating all the time, attracting the bees-like-hawkers (who were allowed to roam freely in the entire stadium, selling everything from 'cheeps', lemon 'peshaal' signaling special lemon tea, cool water and badaam and were guilty of the criminal offence of interjecting the maestro's music with their cries of product advertising!!). Her beau, oblivious to how much he was spending, couldn't seem to get himself to concentrate on the stage, is all I can say.

One row ahead of us to our left, sat a trio of the most boring young guys I have ever come across. They didn't clap for more than 3 seconds at a stretch, with gaps of at least half an hour between each such exercise. It almost felt like they had been punished  and were made to sit through the entire event. Even if Rahman himself had come to them, they wouldn't have uttered a cheer or enthusiastic hoot! I just hope they had free tickets to the show, because otherwise they've genuinely wasted their bucks!

And behind was a family with such levels of intelligence, I should have congratulated them. The boy was shouting to his dad for chewing gum in the middle of a sufi song when the whole crowd was swaying in the musical magic. Once, another one of them was completely unaware of the fact that it was their cell phone which was ringing loudly. And at one time when the sound fell really low due to some technical glitch for a few seconds, this man shouted from nearly the last row of the stadium "Raise the volume!". Seriously, Sir? You really think the organizers can hear you from this far? His voice decibels barely managed to reach the next 15 rows of people, I think!

When Rahman played out his crowd-favourite Jai Ho!, this man next to me, stood in the attention stance. I wish he knew Jai Ho is NOT our National Anthem. He could have crooned it aloud and fist pumped the air a little. But alas!

It felt as if the people around me were saving all their enthusiasm for the Goddess Durga! 'Cuz the other blocks in the stadium could definitely be heard on the stage!

That's the other side of RahmanIshq!

Reporting directly from the stands, signing off for the day!

I found my Twin Soul!

Me : Found this beautifully worded quote on the internet ---
“I would like to be the air that inhabits you for a moment only. I would like to be that unnoticed and that necessary.”
Mr. Sensible : That is so romantic!
Me (Thinking deeply, frowning) : I would say these are subtle words portraying underlying obsession.
Mr. Sensible : Obsession is not the correct word here.
Me : I wouldn't like to be that important or necessary in anyone's life. Of course it would be flattering to be that important.
But I would feel suffocated after some time and would want to move on.
Me (adding hastily) : I'm sorry to ruin the romance of the words!
Mr. Sensible (disappointed and angry) : Well, you actually did!
Unsure, I sent it to another friend who is in, or we could say, working on a relationship.
Me : Found this beautifully worded quote on the internet ---
“I would like to be the air that inhabits you for a moment only. I would like to be that unnoticed and that necessary.”
Twin Soul : Why would I like to be necessary and unnoticed for someone else?
And I'm jumping with joy! I found my twin soul!
PS : Mr. Sensible is so good looking and understanding and charming (& sensible, of course), he would easily find several women wanting to be the air for him!

If only I could fly away!

I sat by the window,

Looking out at the sky,

The forlorn bird flying across

The expanse of blue

Touching the chords of my heart.

The small, brown wonder circled around,

And perched atop the neighboring window.

As it shushed and looked around,

It seemed to mirror my state of mind.

How I longed to fly away,

To soar higher than ever

But day upon day,

The burden increased,

Bogging me down forever.

Another sparrow came and sat near,

The two chirping away,

I glanced at my empty beside,

While the pair made its' way.

Alas! For me there was no escape,

The chains never seemed to unbind,

And so I sat there looking at the blue expanse,

Forlorn, more than ever.

Trying to locate the silver lining,

More hopeful than ever.

P.S.:  You may not know it, but you make a big difference in my life, my thoughts, my being. Thank you so much! This is dedicated solely to you! Thank you, Aayush!

To dream of love...

I got into my car. After a long day of work, all I wanted to do was sleep! I asked the driver to take me home.

I checked my cell for any messages or calls. Three calls from Mother! I called her and told her I'll be home in another 30 minutes. No messages from Nikhil. Wishful thinking.

I laid my head on the seat, stashed away the phone in my bag.

He held my hand in his. I looked to my right. Nikhil was sitting, reading something on his cell. I squeezed his hand lightly. Tearing his eyes from his cell, he looked at me and smiled. His eyes locked with mine.

Just the sight of him made my heart skip a beat! He didn't even know that my heart does that for him.

He set his cell aside.  I snuggled closer to him, resting my head on his shoulders. Being near him, somehow felt so reassuring. I just wanted to stay like that forever. The silence didn't hurt. The ache in my back did!

"Long day?" he asked.

"Hmmm. Very long. Very tiring!"

"Tell me about it."

"You don't wanna know."

"Of course I do."

"Then how come you never call. Or ask. Or spend some time alone. You know I'd like it."

"You never said so."

"Well, I just did! I like you, and I treat you special. I want to feel the same."

There was no reply.

I turned to look at him. Umm, there was no him!

I looked at my palm cupping the air, waiting for someone to slide a hand in.

Crap! I'd drifted off to sleep!

People say dreams come true! I wanted to make sure this one did.

I retrieved my cell from my handbag.

I dialed Nikhil.

"Hey!" said the voice at the other end.

"Hi!"

"Long day?" he asked.

My heart skipped a beat!

Exam? What the hell!

Hi!

I have an exam to write tomorrow!

And here I am writing to you guys!

And that's because I've done everything else I could to distract myself from pages and pages of the boring-ly theoretical audit paper I have tomorrow. My under-grad audit paper.

Sitting at home, with the Celsius chart soaring, I could feel the bout of laziness coming over me in the morning itself! After much deliberations with my boss, I'd managed to get an off today. And there I was studying for half an hour at a go and taking a one hour break thereafter!

I watched half of Gossip Girl, then returned to 'Is the auditor a watchdog or bloodhound?'. Later, I tuned into a sci-fi comedy Fantastic Four followed by how audit is different from investigation. So bored was I that I went on Facebook after really long and liked statuses and pics randomly, installed, tried, then uninstalled apps on my phone and even checked out my Pinterest profile! All the while studying in between, mind you!

I still have around 30 pages to read. I've just tried on a new shade of nail paint. Read two pages. Started writing this post on insistence of my friend Ritika, who by the way, is in a worse state than me! She has 50 pages left to read!

Now that I've updated you guys, I guess I'll have to start studying again.

But before that, sorry Boss but I really, really am studying! Just with a little too many breaks in between!

Cool or un- cool?!

Of late I've noticed a lot of things going around me - some appreciable; others rather disappointing!

The other day, I was travelling to an early morning tuition by bus, and to my surprise I saw the bus was being manned by a lady conductor! That was so damn cool, considering the fact that you see very few female passengers at that time of the day, and here was a lady managing a bus by herself. In view of the depressing state of affairs of west Bengal, when it comes to women, this was indeed a welcome sight.

Often in offices, you notice that a lot of the employees and in some cases (though not so rare), even employers are re-christened with names, names which may not be supposed to mean well. To a certain extent, the re-christening part is bearable, but at times when it gets too rough and rude, it becomes really, really, un-cool! It then looks like a clear cut expression of not wanting to work under or with someone, either out of ego or due to lack of compatibility and failure to adjust.

Singing for your girlfriend, and letting out a low whistle on seeing her --- romantically cheesy yet understandably cool.

Hooting at a girl on the road and passing comments or singing to her, either directly or indirectly --- so not cool!

An initiative named M.A.R.D - Men Against Rape and Discrimination by Bollywood actor Farhan Akhtar, is so cool and hopefully will go on to be successful.

Keeping the name of your movie - Mard ko dard nai hota, is ... Do i really need to say it out loud?!

Life seems to be talking.

"Life always waits for some crisis to occur before revealing itself at its most brilliant."

And that is the best part about life! It throws curveballs and boomerangs at you! And you never know where your next step will lead you to, what the next day will bring for you, who the next person in your life will be...

Destiny, karma, tarot, fortune - these cannot decide what will happen. They cannot predict your future, no matter the tall claims they make.

It is all in your hands. The clay is ready to be moulded any way you want.

As I sit by my window, the sun playing peekaboo with the morning clouds, the spring breeze keeping the mood lazy, the sun rays reflecting on the glass paneled building in front of me, I feel good about my life.

My life is in my hands. And so is yours.

Is it me, or is the world losing it?

The world is indeed a strange place to live in...

We Indians believe in God, a lot, mostly out of fear. We believe in dedicating each day to a God. And we believe in celebrating every festival possible. All good till here? Well, mostly. Unless like me, you find this undaunted staunchness in religion weird. Now comes the stranger part.
To honour the Gods and Goddesses, we don't play hymns or bhajans at the make shift pandals in Calcutta. We play the most raunchy Bollywood songs available! From Sheila to Fevicol to Munni.. You just have to name it!

News came in today that there's been a meteorite shower in Russia. All these years whenever the papers carried news of prospective showers, they never were actually visible. And look today what hit the unprepared Russians! Way to go NASA and similar organizations!

Oh and the main traffic signals of Calcutta have songs of Rabindra Nath Tagore being played all day long. Like the honking wasn't enough! But that is the change our Honorable Chief Minister believes in bringing about. Are we obliged or what?!

Oh! The Gods have a new song to listen to... Hookah Bar is being played now!

The change I want to be.

It is that time of the year again! Time to make resolutions!
Another year has begun.

This year I am not keeping any resolutions. Not because I don't complete them (which most often I don't!), but because I promise to make every day a new day, because I promise to live in the present, because I will treat one day at a time, because I will be the change I want to see in others.

On the morning of the first day of the year, on the way to office all I could crib about was the fact that I had to work today also. When I finally emerged out of my self-obsession, I noticed a poor lady sitting in the same bus, with her three children. On the cold wintry morning, they barely had enough clothes to cover themselves. Their feet were bare. They looked fatigued. Yet they were smiling and talking to one another. I looked around me. There were others who would have to work much more than me. Not just today, everyday. The bus drivers, conductors, police personnel, domestic helps, the shopkeepers, their staff. And a lot of other people. I realized I am not the only person who works. There are several others in situations worse than me. I have several choices when it comes to my life. Several of them don't.

I felt, if nothing else, blessed.

And I decided that I will no longer complain. And this isn't a resolution. I don't want to forget this halfway into January 2013.

This is the change I want to be.

Happy New Year!

To sin by silence when we must protest makes cowards of men.

Is the world ending today?

Metaphorically it's nearing the end.

Because a girl doesn't feel safe of venturing out anymore. Because getting on a wrong bus can have as dangerous results as getting raped. Because the world doesn't stop to help you reach a hospital. Because you are treated like a rag doll by not just the ones who raped you but also by others who blame you for the rape. Because the police still hasn't caught the absconding cowards. And to top it all, this happened in the streets of the capital of India. I have no remorse in saying that humanity has ended.

And I say I have no remorse because we get enough of it from our politicians, police, carriers of justice and the countless other people in society who simply express remorse on every incident of assault carried not on any man or woman in this country. We are done with your sympathies.

Oh! And sympathies? Let's not get into it.

Our police and politicians issue warnings to women.

Don't go out at night!
Don't travel alone!
Don't wear clothes which may even be slightly inappropriate!

Somehow it is always construed to be the woman's fault.

Instead of blaming us for it all, do you people mind taking any steps to improve the society we are living in, to implement our laws effectively so that not even one of these social menaces dare harm us.

And I'm not saying only the men of our society have lost all shame and empathy.

Just today, while our teacher was announcing a candlelight march as a mark of silent protest during our tuition hours, I overheard this conversation :

Girl 1 -  What is he talking about?
Girl 2 - A march for the Delhi rape victim.
Girl 1 - Was she a CA student?
Girl 2  - No.
Girl 1 - Then why is he bothering us?

I have no words to express what I felt then.

It is time we did something about it. Yes, we. We, as humans, and not as the public, politicians, police, army men, but we as humans need to revive the humanity we seem to have lost.

It is never the wrong time to do the right thing.

But literally, will the world end or not? More than that should it or shouldn't it?

Just when you lose hope...

It was a normal working day. Nothing special. Except that it was his birthday. His first birthday away from home. His first birthday when he couldn’t share the joy of spending one more year with his loved ones. Calls poured in all day long. Yet he felt all the more away, all the lonelier, and all the more alone. Time to go back home he thought as he started putting his papers back in place.

His cell beeped. His roommate would be back late. His meeting had been delayed which meant birthday celebrations at home stood canceled. Great!

“Hey Abhinav! All packed? Lets go. I’ll drop you home” Gaurav said.

Gaurav was more of a friend than colleague. “Sumedha’s waiting downstairs” he said referring to his wife.

On the way home they stopped at a newly opened restraint.

“Happy birthday!” Sumedha wished him from behind the wheel, while Gaurav handed Abhinav a gift.

“What’s this guys?”

“Just to make you feel all the more special”

“Come we’re having dinner together, the treat’s on us.”

From the next hour Abhinav felt like he was almost home.

Yet when they dropped him off, he couldn’t help feeling lonely again. To ward off going to an empty home, he decided to take a small walk.

He called up his mother.

“Hi mom, what are you doing?”

“Happy birthday! We were just done with dinner.”

“No cake for dinner this year?” he asked, forlorn.

“We’ll definitely have some when we meet! I’ll bake your favorite chocolate cake. Where are you by the way? You haven’t reached home yet? Still working?”

“No mom! I’m done with dinner. Went out with Gaurav & Sumedha. Just out for a walk right now. I’m missing…”

“Abhi, I’ll call you back, wait” and the line disconnected

“I love you mom. I miss you all a lot.” he said, staring at the phone.

With heavy legs and a heavier heart, he walked back to his place. Climbing up the stairs, he saw one of his fellow residents being greeted by his children, the warmth and love of a family pouring out of their place. Waving towards the father, he trudged along the stairs and put his key into the lock. Opening the door, he switched on the lights of his place and was greeted by shrieks of “Happy Birthday!”

Shocked, he banged the door shut! He couldn’t believe his eyes! His eyes welled up with tears as he stood looking at his family. His girlfriend stood nearby holding out the chocolate cake for him.

He had never been happier!

Necessity may not be the mother of inventions!

The world is in serious need of some more inventions! We need something more. Something which will blow your minds off.

- Firstly and most urgently I, sorry we, we all need such a pair of spectacles which glow in the dark. How else do I see where I’ve kept my specs! Oh and once you manage glow in the dark, please go for glow in the light! C'mon I need to find them in the day also!

- Ok then I’ll need an invention which can help me alter the storyline of the daily soaps we see. So then I can make Meredith Grey marry Derek before having to wait for another season. Then I can give Castle more punch lines and bickering and lesser heartbreaks! And yes I’ll make those lead females in Hindi soaps cry lesser!

- And can you scientists or believers of magic, to whoever this applies, can you please make the flying car real? Not because we want to catch up on missed trains, though JKR's idea was brilliant, as always! But because, the roads in Calcutta seem to be narrowing and the volume of cars expanding. And the absence of too many skyscrapers will also be easy on the flying machines.

- Lastly, and on a less serious note (oh ya, I'm dead serious about the above requisitions!) can we, just if it's possible have moving pictures in our newspapers? Yes, this is inspired from JKR. I'm simply putting in a request for her idea! Big fan of the Harry Potter and the Daily Prophet, you see.

Do you want any inventions? Put it up! You never know, someone somewhere might just start working on it! Cuz someone once told me, 'You just have to believe that it's possible.'

Oh, and I'd like to thank two of my special friends, Shradha and Radhika, for missing my blog posts and inspiring me to write more often. I'll try harder girls! Promise! 

Think differently post-Diwali!

Between Diwali and Durga Puja, the essence of festivities nearly died for me, what with me slogging in the office for nearly 12 hours a day!  But with Diwali here and gone there are so many small things which we do only once a year, which define Diwali for me, at least. Of course, bursting crackers defines Diwali for many, the Puja matters the most to others, but think differently and you'll realize the small things matter too!

• Making the rangoli! At first taking the lead because you want to make a bright and beautiful one. And then with the evening of the D-Day approaching, requesting all family members to put in a hand so that it just gets over!

 

 

• Painting the diyas! Many of us have stopped doing that, but trust me, that one day always allows you to be creative and splash colours the way you want! It just has to look good always. And it does look good always. Unless you have the penchant to really screw things up!

 

 

• Wax candles! Not all of us make those at home, but if you did, you'd realize that in those moments when you're required to sit absolutely still, holding the wick in the molten wax, you will recall the silliest jokes and even a simple line can seem double-meaning and will make you shake with silent laughter!

• And lastly, spring cleaning in autumn! I love those days when you can spend hours cleaning your room when in reality you're poring over old pictures and reliving your school days when life was less complicated!

What defines your Diwali?!

Durga Puja fervour in Calcutta!

It was 4:30 in the morning. The birds hadn’t even started chirping. Something disturbed my sleep. I awoke with a start. I could hear the dhak (drum beats). Durga Puja had arrived!

Covering my ears with the pillow, to muffle out the sound, I tried sleeping again, a smile on my face.

The Pujas had come! The next five days Calcutta would swirl and dance in the revelry of worshipping the Goddess, the city would shine bright through the night, people from the nearby towns would come to visit, sell, and soak themselves in the merriment!

One could see people anywhere, anytime! At 7 am, there’re people on the road. At 1 pm, again people. At 10 pm, still there! At 3 am, no the crowd doesn’t thin out!

These five days — dusk or dawn, morning or evening, noon or midnight – you just couldn’t make out the difference. The city didn’t sleep!

On the few tours made of the various pandals (temporary bamboo structures to house the Goddess), it was hard to miss that the traffic police personnel were having a tougher time manning the crowds than the vehicles!

One of the parks near my place had set up rides along with the pandal. Giant wheel was the hot choice! Not only did it give me the much needed adrenalin rush, but when I looked towards the sky, while my capsule was on the upward journey, I could almost feel myself reaching out to touch the moon. Those few minutes symbolized freedom more than anything! And then came the reality check. As soon as I stepped out of the dark and seldom used back gate of the park, I saw myself staring at a family of a mother and two children. Lying on the footpath, with tattered blankets barely covering them, the mother was trying to put her children to sleep amidst the din of celebrations in the land beyond!

The Pujas mix all hues of reality and of the realms beyond. They mean a lot of things to a lot of people, but to me it’s the time when my city looks and feels surreal!

The Pujas define Calcutta, its old-world charm, its people, its warmth, its serenity, its culture, its madness, everything!

As I sit here writing this, the roads outside are unusually silent! I hear the distant drum beats occasionally as the idols are being taken to the Ganges for immersion, marking the end of Pujas. A year to go, before She comes again!

May the Goddess bless us all!

Film-bound!

Did I tell you guys I spend a lot of time catching up on films when I need a break from office and studies?
I don't really like those trashy-without-a-story-line films though. Last week I saw the Paresh Rawal-starrer, Akshay Kumar-supported OMG: Oh My God! And the film’s name couldn’t have contained my reactions in a better way. The sublime yet effective impact the film had on the audience is applaudable. If you still haven’t seen it, watch it not for it’s tremendous script, the beautiful thought, the superb acting, Akshay’s stunning entry! No don’t watch it for any of this. Watch it for yourself, to take a much-needed and highly likable break.

And when it comes to watching films which become memorable, how can I forget these:

• Lage Raho Munnabhai - A film which changes the portrayal of Gandhi in all our minds! 
• Aamir - The common man always lives the hard way.
• A Wednesday - Don't underestimate anyone. No one.
• Kahaani - A thriller in the true sense. Hell hath no fury like a woman scorned!
• Vicky Donor - Charity begins at home. Maybe not always!
• Taare Zameen Par - Not the best film to watch when you want to relax, but one of those best ones when it comes to emotional connect and content.

Coming Soon : Memorable English films! At all theaters near you!

P.S. : Just got an invite for another film! ;)

Wake Me Up When September Ends!

Nostalgia haunts!

There was a time when school friends used to drag me in the rain and I used to enjoy the drops of water falling all over me! A soaked-to-the-skin trip home would be met with the ire of mother. And today I prefer to roll up the car windows when it rains!

While passing by a school church today, with the morning mass bell chiming along, I was swarmed with thoughts of our morning assembly in school. And then after so long I witnessed the adjoining school assembly going on, from the corridors of my college.

While attending a very boring lecture in college the other day, I noticed that the lecturer was rocking back and forth while reading her notes. So bored was I that I traveled two years into the past to a soft skills course I'd taken, where our Sir used to constantly reprimand us for moving too much while addressing an audience! you can very well imagine how boring the lecture was! And Zubin Sir, see I still remember what you taught us!

And the reason for nostalgia hitting me in the middle of September (a peak pressure period for the ones in the CA profession!), is that today after a long, long time Calcutta's seen a bandh, meaning an off-day from office and work! How I miss these bandhs which were a regular feature until the new government came a year ago! 

All nostalgic, waiting for another off-day to come my way! Actually even a holiday on Sunday would do!

P.S : I know I haven't been regular this month with my blog posts and I'm sorry people, but there has been just no time at all! See you post-September! Or maybe before (hopefully)!

What do you miss most?!